Έντεκα (σκόρπιες δηλώσεις) [+ Μπέργκμαν + Αντονιόνι]

Με προσκάλεσαν να παίξω σ' ένα παιχνίδι με ατάκες που μου φάνηκε τόσο περίπλοκο που αποφάσισα να το αγνοήσω. Όμως τελικά το παραλλάσω (αρκετά) και το αφιερώνω στο μοναδικό markmyword. Μπλεγμένες κακίες και σοφίες - ο πλήρης σουρεαλισμός:

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1) Τζίμης Πανούσης – καλλιτέχνης. «Η τέχνη δεν θέλει θυσίες, οι θυσίες θέλουν τέχνη».

2) Έρση Σωτηροπούλου – συγγραφέας «Κι αν νιώθω ότι κάπου ανήκω, αυτές είναι οι τσούλες, οι βιζιτούδες, αυτές που έχουν ένα τηλέφωνο για τα ραντεβού και ένα για το love-story».

3) Snoop Dogg (από το Pass it Pass it): «The West got the best, the East got the peace.»

4) Chi Chi Larue (σκηνοθέτης ταινιών πορνό): «That whole “cybersex” thing – I don’t know. I’m just afraid of the day that they can digitally create a man that looks just like a human and can fuck on film – and then we won’t have to hire real people anymore... We can digitally have unsafe sex – no condoms and cumshots in the mouth. Everything. That’s scary to me. Too weird. I like real people.»

5) Ρούλα Βροχοπούλου – πρώην παίκτρια ριάλιτι. Η πληρωμένη απάντησή της στις ειρωνικές ερωτήσεις της Τ. Στεφανίδου για τον γάμο της με Αλβανό πολύ μικρότερό της: «Γιατί, κυρία Τατιάνα μου, τα λέτε αυτά; Και το αφεντικό σας δεν πήρε ένα μπουμπούκι;» [εννοώντας τον πρόεδρο του Αντ1 Μίνωα Κυριακού και την εξαιρετικά νεότερή του Μαρί Κωνσταντάτου].

6) Νorthcote Parkinson – συγγραφέας: «Κάθε δουλειά διαστέλλεται με τέτοιο τρόπο ώστε να καλύπτει τον χρόνο που διαθέτουμε για την εκτέλεσή της»

7) Ανδρέας Bουτσινάς – σκηνοθέτης. Για όταν πρωτοδιάβασε την Ελένη του Ευριπίδη την οποία επρόκειτο να ανεβάσει στην Επίδαυρο: "Όταν το διάβασα ξετρελάθηκα, γέλασα πάρα πολύ, τηλεφώνησα [σε συνεργάτη] και του το είπα και μου απάντησε πως «Εμείς το ανεβάζουμε, συνήθως, τραγωδία!» Του λέω να με αφήσει να το ξαναδιαβάσω γιατί μπορεί να έσφαλλα. Μα όταν λοιπόν το ξαναδιάβασα με την ιδέα ότι είναι τραγωδία, γελούσα ακόμη περισσότερο!"

8) Malcolm Bradbury – συγγραφέας: "Φανταστείτε το μυαλό σαν μια αράχνη που φτιάχνει ιστούς. Αν τους ελέγχουμε, αν τους κρατάμε απερίσπαστους και σταθερούς τότε είμαστε στοχαστές. Αν τους αφήνουμε να περιελίσσονται και να περιπλέκονται τότε είμαστε ονειροπόλοι."

9) Γιώργος Ρωμαίος –πολιτικός, υπεύθυνος για την ΕΡΤ στα ‘80ς: "Οταν ήμουν στην ΕΡΤ τότε που έπαιζε συνέχεια Μπρεχτ και ευρωπαϊκό κινηματογράφο, μου τηλεφωνεί ένα βράδυ ο [πρωθυπουργός τότε] Ανδρέας: «Πολύ σοβαρή τηλεόραση κάνετε. Δεν έχω τι να δω τα βράδια. Εμένα μου αρέσουν τα γουέστερν»! Τι να κάνω κι εγώ, αγοράζω ένα βίντεο και του στέλνω 30 κασέτες γουέστερν από την ΕΡΤ με τη σημείωση: Δες αυτά, πρόεδρε, και άμα τελειώσουν σου στέλνω κι άλλα..."

10) Γιάννη Ρίτσος – ποιητής. "Άλλωστε με τα χρόνια λιγοστευουν τα πάντα... Ισως γιατι συγκεντρωνονται και σμιγουν."

11) Robert Anton Wilson - συγγραφέας: "It only takes 20 years for a liberal to become a conservative without changing a single idea. In an evolving universe, who stands still moves backwards."

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Εκτός συναγωνισμού

Στους, ας πούμε αιφνίδιους, θανάτους του φετινού Ιουλίου: τη μια μέρα ο Μπέργκμαν την επόμενη ο Αντονιόνι [τα μεγάλα πνεύματα συναντιούνται!]

11 δηλώσεις του Μπέργκμαν:

1) [για τον Αντονιόνι] He's done two masterpieces, you don't have to bother with the rest... You know, Antonioni never really learned the trade... He concentrated on single images, never realising that film is a rhythmic flow of images, a movement... I never understood why Antonioni was so incredibly applauded. And I thought his muse Monica Vitti was a terrible actress.
2) I know the first film I ever saw — it must have been some time in 1924, when I was six or so... was Black Beauty. About a stallion. I still recall a sequence with fire. It was burning, I remember that vividly…
3) Film as dream, film as music. No art passes our conscience in the way film does, and goes directly to our feelings, deep down into the dark rooms of our souls.
4) In former days the artist remained unknown and his work was to the glory of God... Today the individual has become the highest form and the greatest bane of artistic creation.
5) Say anything you want against The Seventh Seal. My fear of death — this infantile fixation of mine — was, at that moment, overwhelming. I felt myself in contact with death day and night, and my fear was tremendous. When I finished the picture, my fear went away.
6) [για τον Jean-Luc Godard] I can't see his pictures. I sit for perhaps twenty-five or thirty or fifty minutes and then I have to leave, because his pictures make me so nervous. I have the feeling the whole time that he wants to tell me things, but I don't understand what it is, and sometimes I have the feeling that he's bluffing, double-crossing me… I've never gotten anything out of his movies. They have felt constructed, faux intellectual and completely dead. Cinematographically uninteresting and infinitely boring. Godard is a fucking bore. He's made his films for the critics.
7) [για τον Orson Welles] For me he's just a hoax. It's empty. It's not interesting. It's dead. Citizen Kane, which I have a copy of — is all the critics' darling, always at the top of every poll taken, but I think it's a total bore. Above all, the performances are worthless. The amount of respect that movie's got is absolutely unbelievable.
8) When film is not a document, it is dream. That is why Tarkovsky is the greatest of them all. He moves with such naturalness in the room of dreams. He doesn't explain. What should he explain anyhow? All my life I have hammered on the doors of the rooms in which he moves so naturally. Only a few times have I managed to creep inside. Most of my conscious efforts have ended in embarrassing failure...
9) The demons are innumerable, arrive at the most inappropriate times and create panic and terror... but I have learned that if I can master the negative forces and harness them to my chariot, then they can work to my advantage.... Lilies often grow out of carcasses' arseholes.
10) In our family we had a well-to-do aunt who always gave us magnificent Christmas presents. Suddenly Aunt Anna's Christmas presents were lying there too, and among them a parcel with 'Forsner's on it. So of course I instantly knew it contained a projector. For a couple of years I'd been consumed with a passionate longing to own one, but had been considered too small for such a present... I was incredibly excited, you can imagine my disappointment when it turned out to be my older brother — he's four years older than myself — who got the projector — and I was given a teddy bear. It was one of my life's bitterest disappointments. After all, my brother wasn't a scrap interested in cinematography. But both of us had masses of lead soldiers. So on Boxing Day I bought the projector off him for half my army and he beat me hollow in every war ever afterwars. But I'd got the projector, anyway.
11) I hope I never get so old I get religious.

Και 11 δηλώσεις του Αντονιόνι:

1) Hollywood is like being nowhere and talking to nobody about nothing.
2) A scene has to have a rhythm of its own, a structure of its own.
3) I began taking liberties a long time ago; now it is standard practice for most directors to ignore the rules.
4) I meant exactly what I said: that we are saddled with a culture that hasn't advanced as far as science.
5) When man becomes reconciled to nature, when space becomes his true background, these words and concepts will have lost their meaning, and we will no longer have to use them.
6) All the characters in my films are fighting these problems, needing freedom, trying to find a way to cut themselves loose, but failing to rid themselves of conscience, a sense of sin, the whole bag of tricks.
7) Till now I have never shot a scene without taking account of what stands behind the actors because the relationship between people and their surroundings is of prime importance.
8) My technique, which differs from film to film, is wholly instinctive and never based on a priori considerations.
9) You know what I would like to do: make a film with actors standing in empty space so that the spectator would have to imagine the background of the characters.
10) When I am shooting a film I never think of how I want to shoot something; I simply shoot it.
11) Scientific man is already on the moon, and yet we are still living with the moral concepts of Homer.

Η επιστροφή των μεγάλων: Δύο μεγάλα πνεύματα του παγκόσμιου κινηματογράφου συναντώνται ξανά στις αίθουσες. Ο Ίνγκμαρ Μπέργκμαν και ο Μικελάντζελο Αντονιόνι ανησυχούν ακόμα για τον έρωτα και τις σχέσεις των ζευγαριών. [Ενα κείμενο από το περιοδικό "Πρώτο Πλάνο", Σεπτ. 2003, εδώ]

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